Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts
Showing posts with label memories. Show all posts

Thursday, December 31, 2009

For Auld Lang Syne 12-31-2009

Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And never brought to mind?
Should auld acquaintance be forgot,
And auld lang syne?

For auld lang syne, my dear,
For auld lang syne,
We'll tak a cup o' kindness yet,
For auld lang syne.


In the above photo taken last May, Cliff is presenting scholarships to students at a local high school.  My thoughts tonight center around memories of our twenty-two years together:

I remember you, you're the one who made my dreams come true, a few kisses ago.
I remember you, you're the one who said I love you too, I do, didn't you know?
I remember too a distant bell, and stars that fell like rain out of the blue.
When my life is through and the angels ask me to recall the thrill of them all,
Then I shall tell them, I remember you.

(Lyrics by: johnny mercer; Music by: victor schertzinger)

To my family and friends, thank you for your support during these past difficult weeks.  I love you all and wish you the best in 2010.

Monday, December 21, 2009

Hanging in there, part ii


A song that has comforted me for many years is "Turning Toward the Morning" by Gordon Bok.  Now the words of the song seem more appropriate than ever before.

Turning Toward the Morning

(Gordon Bok)

When the deer has bedded down
And the bear has gone to ground,
And the northern goose has wandered off
To warmer bay and sound,
It's so easy in the cold to feel
The darkness of the year
And the heart is growing lonely
For the morning

Oh, my Joanie, don't you know
That the stars are swinging slow,
And the seas are rolling easy
As they did so long ago?
If I had a thing to give you,
I would tell you one more time
That the world is always turning
Toward the morning.

Now October's growing thin
And November's coming home;
You'll be thinking of the season
And the sad things that you've seen,
And you hear that old wind walking,
Hear him singing high and thin,
You could swear he's out there singing
Of your sorrow.

When the darkness falls around you
And the Northwind come to blow,
And you hear him call you name out
As he walks the brittle snow:
That old wind don't mean you trouble,
He don't care or even know,
He's just walking down the darkness
Toward the morning.

It's a pity we don't know
What the little flowers know.
They can't face the cold November
They can't take the wind and snow:
They put their glories all behind them,
Bow their heads and let it go,
But you know they'll be there shining
In the morning.

Now, my Joanie, don't you know
That the days are rolling slow,
And the winter's walking easy,
As he did so long ago?
And, if that wind would come and ask you,
"Why's my Joanie weeping so?"
Won't you tell him that you're weeping
For the morning?

Oh, my Joanie, don't you know
That the stars are swinging slow,
And the seas are rolling easy
As they did so long ago?
If I had a thing to give you,
I would tell you one more time
That the world is always turning
Toward the morning.
----------------------------------------------------------------

Recorded by Bok, Trickett and Muir on "Turning Toward the
Morning", FSI-56, copyright 1975.

"One of the things that provoked this song was a letter last
November from a friend who had had a very difficult year and was
looking for the courage to keep on plowing into it. Those times,
you lift your eyes unto the hills, as they say, but the hills of
Northern New England in November can be about as much comfort as
a cold crowbar. You have to look ahead a bit, then, and realize
that all the hills and trees and flowers will still be there come
Spring, usually more permanent than your troubles. And if your
courage occasionally fails, that's okay, too: nobody expects you
to be as strong (or as old) as the land." - Gordon Bok

I am waiting for the morning.

Joanie

Sunday, November 22, 2009

Hanging in there



If Cliff had lived, he would be 76 years old today.  Today grandson Brandon (right above) emailed pictures from Cliff's birthday last year.

I started a new scrapbook yesterday with mementos of our life together. 


We had so much fun together.  Except for his last several months when he was so ill, I think he was happy.  I want to remember him as he was before he became so ill, and in his five wishes document that is how he said he wanted to be remembered.


Do you have an advance medical directive?  If not, I encourage you to execute one.  The five wishes document is inexpensive.  You can find it at http://www.agingwithdignity.org/five-wishes.php.

Joanie

Sunday, November 15, 2009

In Loving Memory



My beloved, my best friend with whom I spent the last twenty-two years, departed this life on Thursday, Nov 12, 2009, ten days short of his 76th birthday.  He had been so ill.  I was with him, along with one of his daughters and one of his grandsons, when he took his final breath.

At this moment I cannot begin to imagine what life will be like without him.  His health concerns occupied a lot of our time for several years and became intense in the current year.  As hard as it was at times, I do not regret one single moment of caring for him. 

The funeral will be Tuesday, and interment on Wednesday. Then I will begin the next stage of my life.

Joanie

Friday, September 11, 2009

September 11th

Where were you on Sept 11, 2001? I was here in my home. It was a sunny, cool, beautiful September morning. I had a train ticket from Fredericksburg, VA to Williamsburg, VA, where I was to meet my sister for a couple days shopping at the Pottery Factory. Williamsburg was "our place" -- where we traditionally got together as sisters, away from family demands, to spend a few days together and indulge in our love of shopping for bargains.

When it became clear that the U.S. was under attack, I left here and drove to Williamsburg to meet my sister, who was driving up from Florida. I could not bear the thought of my baby sister alone during this frightening time. Fearing to travel down the East Coast, I drove the back roads through the Shenandoah Valley. The whole memory of that time my sister and I spent together is surreal. I honestly don't remember much else about our time together -- where we shopped, where we ate, etc. I just remember being glued to the tv, radio, or newspaper, and being fearful.

I spent 31 years of my life working in the Pentagon, but had retired before 9-11-2001. In the aftermath of the 9-11 attacks, I often dreamed about being in the Pentagon in the weeks (and years) to follow. My most recent dream was last night.

After the 9-11 attacks on America, I bought the above license plate for my car. It is a reminder of the horror that was inflicted on our country on 9-11-2001. I will have had my car 13 years this coming December, and I have only 45,000 miles on it so far. I expect to drive it for at least another 55,000 miles. Will I live that long?

I still have my train ticket from Fredericksburg to Williamsburg on 9-11-2001.

Where were you on 9-11-2001?